A Comparative Analysis of OREO Cookies and Stuf
Background
OREO cookies have always been a part of my life. In elementary school, finding that my mom had packed a few in my lunch was an occasion worth celebrating. Later in life, my love affair with OREOs really began in earnest when I started backpacking, packing them along as a delicious source of lightweight energy.
I’m sure many of you have a similar relationship with them. OREOs unite children, adults, vegans, couch potatoes, athletes, and stoners. They’re truly a cookie for the people. The only thing that seems to divide us is the debate on whether the Original or Double Stuf are tastier. I’ve always leaned towards the former, even when most of my friends have gone for the latter.
Introduction and Motivation
Last week, a new limited-edition version of the cookie caught my eye at my local supermarket, but this time it wasn’t a wild new flavour. It was the Mega Stuf OREO, “for those who like even more creme in their OREO cookies. Stuffed with three times more creme than the original”
Despite my preference for the Original amount of creme, of course I had to try these. But when I walked over to the display, I was surprised to notice another package I had never seen before: Most Stuf OREO which made the claim to “thrill with nearly four times the filling as the beloved classic. Our most creme, ever.”
To someone that thinks that Double Stuf is too much Stuf, four times sounded blasphemous. Still, a self-respecting OREO enthusiast like me doesn’t just walk away from something like that empty-handed. So I grabbed a package each of Mega Stuf and Most Stuf. But now that I had two packages of OREOs in my shopping basket, it occurred to me that leaving the store like that would be just half-assing it.
If I was going to do this thing and truly understand the OREO under different levels of Stuf, I would need to be comprehensive. I walked down the cookie aisle and picked up one package each of the more conventional Thins, Original, and Double Stuf and made my way to the cashier with a weird mix of embarrassment and pride.
On my way home, a plan started to form in my head. I was going to study these cookies, really get to the root of things, you know? Form a deep understanding on how the level of Stuf affects the OREO.
Methods
Now, I wasn’t just going to casually eat five boxes of OREOs. No, there would be measurements, data, and copious note taking. I didn’t get a master’s degree in applied science for nothing. This might end up being the most precise thing I’ve done since trying to replicate the Cavendish Experiment in first year physics class, I thought to myself.
Thickness: The first order of business was to measure the thickness of each OREO, broken down by the cookie and creme segments. I used a tape measure because I don’t own calipers or anything more precise.
Mass: Next, I measured the mass of each cookie on a kitchen scale. I also wanted to know the breakdown of mass for cookie versus creme, which meant I needed to carefully pull the components apart before putting them individually on the scale. In cases where the creme would stubbornly hang onto the cookie, I ate it off.
Nutrition: I wanted to understand how the macronutrient composition of each cookie varied along with the level of creme. Backpackers will often choose food based on its caloric density (often expressed as Calories per Ounce), so this was important. Absent any real scientific instruments, I relied on the information on the package for this information.
Taste: I ate a bunch of OREOs and decided how much I liked them.
Overall: Taking into consideration the four metrics above, I ranked each cookie on its overall performance relative to its competitors. I’ll leave this for the very end of the post.
OREO Thins
“OREO Thins pack the original OREO flavor you know and love into a delicate new cookie with a crispier texture, fewer crumbs, and less calories.”
As a rule, I believe that anything at the grocery store that advertises itself as low-calorie or low-fat should be avoided, which is why I had never tried OREO Thins up until this point. But I was pleasantly surprised by them.
These little guys are 7mm thick, including 2mm cookies that are exactly half has thick as those used in the Original OREOs. One of my first notable findings was that despite their name, Thins actually have a higher creme to cookie ratio than Originals.
Finding #1: Thins have a higher creme to cookie ratio than Originals.
Each cookie only has about 64% of the calories of an Original OREO, but I would be surprised if anyone on a calorie-restriction diet wouldn’t simply be tempted to eat more Thins to make up for the, you know, thinness. Besides, I doubt anyone reading this is on a diet.
The Thins tasted chocolatey, crispy, and delicate. They weren’t too sweet, and I enjoyed them much more than I had expected. I regret having written them off for so long as meant only for misguided belt-tightening calorie-counters.
OREO Originals
“Nothing compares to the iconic OREO. The classic combo of cream sandwiched between two chocolate cookies has been winning hearts (and stomachs) for over 100 years.”
My childhood favourite. I found that the Originals were 12mm thick and weighed 12g. Not only that, but both each cookie and creme filling measured 4mm and weighed 4g. That results in a 1:1:1 ratio of cookie to creme to cookie, with each component having a thickness density of 1g/mm. How elegant is that? In high school science class, we learned that the metric system was based on the properties of water, but I was starting to wonder if it was based on the Original OREO.
The 4g, 4mm cookie used for the Original OREOs was the same for all the remaining thicknesses, meaning that the Thins were the only versions with their own unique cookie.
Finding #2: Original, Double, Mega, and Most Stuf all use the same 4mm-thick cookie.
At 55 calories each, two Original OREOs make up a serving according to the package. But I have my doubts that anybody over the age of two has ever exercised the restraint required to eat only two OREOs in one sitting.
After moving up from the Thins, I immediately felt that the Originals were a lot of cookie. And yet, the chocolate was balanced with the creme, and the bit of salt in the cookie really shined through in the Originals compared to any of the other varieties.
Double Stuf
“Stuffed with twice as much delicious OREO creme, these chocolate sandwich cookies are supremely dunkable.”
Double Stuf: all of my friends’ favourite, but the ones I had stubbornly insisted were inferior for years. It was time to see whether that preference held up to closer inspection.
Despite some pretty convincing articles claiming otherwise, I found that the Double Stuf did indeed contain double the amount of creme as Originals. That might have something to do with me using a tape measure and kitchen scale, hardly precision measuring instruments, to conduct this experiment.
Unsurprisingly, Double Stuf contain more calories and are higher fat than the Originals.
When it came to taste, the Double Stuf were sweet, creamy, and soft. It was a tough call to decide if I preferred them, and I definitely needed to eat a bunch before coming to a conclusion.
Mega Stuf
“OREO Mega Stuf Chocolate Sandwich Cookies are for those who like even more creme in their OREO cookies. Stuffed with 3 times more creme than the original, these chocolate sandwich cookies are supremely dunkable.”
Finally, I headed into uncharted territory. I had to check and recheck my tape measure in disbelief when I came across my first truly earth-shattering finding of this whole experiment. At 14mm, Mega Stuf are actually the same thickness as Double Stuf. How could that be? I observed that the increased creme actually came in the form of a wider area, not more thickness.
Finding #3: Mega Stuf are the same thickness as Double Stuf
As I crunched the numbers, Mega Stuf really started to disappoint me. First of all, they contained, by mass, only 2.5 times the amount of creme as Originals, rather than the advertised 3 times. In addition, according to the package, each cookie contained only a paltry 15 calories more than a Double Stuf. Since a package of Mega Stuf cost me $1.50 more than the Double Stuf, I was starting to feel that they held a pretty lacklustre place on the OREO progression.
As for taste, my notes on the Mega Stuf say nothing beyond “Sweet! Sugar!”, which can be good or bad depending on what you’re after in that moment, I guess. I wasn’t a big fan.
Most Stuf
“This limited edition, The Most Stuf OREO, thrills with nearly four times the filling as the beloved classic. Our most creme, ever. “
It was time for the climax of this whole experiment, the comically large Most Stuf OREOs. These are truly the natural progression of gluttony in free market North America. I’m not complaining.
With 14g of creme, the Most Stuf contained 3.5 times the amount of creme as Originals, falling a little short of the advertised 4 times. But in this case, I applaud the manufacturers’ restraint; any more creme would go beyond reasonability.
The Most Stuf manage to pack in twice as much energy as Originals, at 110 calories per cookie, and the caloric density is 9% higher.
When it came to actually eating one, I couldn’t even managed to do it in a single bite. In addition, the sugary taste was overwhelming, and I decidedly enjoyed them the least of all. However, biting into it was practically an adventure. In addition, I felt satisfied with only one, which is not something I’ve ever said about an OREO before this. The Most Stuf gets plenty of points for novelty.
Results
The Verdict
After reviewing my notes on my taste tests in addition to the data I collected, I settled on the following ranking from best to worst:
- Original
- (tie) Thins / Double Stuf
- Most Stuf
- Mega Stuf
Discussion and Conclusions
So, the Originals came out on top. Maybe I’m a purist or too attached to tradition, but I’m convinced. It’s true that the sweet taste from the higher creme ratio in the Thins or Double Stuf is delicious. But if you’re like me, every time you decide to open a package of OREOs, you’re probably going to eat at least a whole row. And at those quantities, the saltiness and chocolatey flavour of the Original cookies properly balances the sweetness of the creme.
The Thins and Double Stuf tied for second place. They’re both delicious cookies, and it turned out the Thins weren’t just for calorie-counters.
Next up was the Most Stuf. It’s true that I kind of hated the taste of them due to the overwhelming sweetness. But what they lacked in taste they more than made up for in novelty. Opening up a package of these and eating just one was an adventure in itself.
In a pretty decisive last place were the Mega Stuf. I felt that they were nothing more than a glorified Double Stuf and didn’t justify the increased price. Although they might have once seemed wild next to an Original, with the Most Stuf right next to them on the shelf, the Megas seem relatively tame.